Wednesday, 8 May 2013

Mouth like ...

  1. a set of pan pipes.
  2. an xylophone with woodworm
  3. a tramp's harmonica
  4. a burnt down fence
  5. a row of condemned houses
  6. granola crumbs
  7. toasted almonds
This list could go on (feel free to add your own description in the comments).

I have been to the dentist a couple of times in the last couple of months.  I've had two wisdom teeth removed that left me looking like the Elephant Man for a couple of days.  I'm due to go for a filling in the next couple of weeks.  And with all this work, why am I still a poster girl for British Teeth?  Now you may read over my list again and know that I'm referring to my teeth.  

I suppose it's not THAT bad.  But my face certainly feels like it's been used as an apprentice welder's bench of late and I don't look anything like an 'after shot' of someone who has had dental work done.

In other news, I enrolled the Egg for school.  She will start in the middle of August.  I'm excited for her to start school - she's so ready for it.  And I've looked forward to the next phase in my life where all the kids will be at school.

And yet..

I can't believe that time is nearly here.  And I'm surprised that I'm feeling quite emotional about it.  I think it's a lot to do with the fact that this is a new chapter in not only Esther's life, but mine too.  No more kids at home.  And I won't deny that it will be great to allow me to work on my fledgling business, but it also means that for 6 hours a day, five days a week, I won't be needed in my capacity as 'Mum' anymore.  And that almost panics me.  Because that's how I'm defined.  And i know I still am... but... Pfft.  Yanno.  Perhaps I need to hire an interpreter to decipher my thoughts and feelings and type them out for me.  They would only need to work a 10 minute shift.

In the meantime, as i try to gather my own thoughts on this unfolding experience, I suggest you go brush your teeth and floss, lest you find yourself having to type out a blog post on how your teeth resemble a mouth full of gravel.

Wednesday, 17 April 2013

I guess this means I'm fickle.

I'm so sad for my blog.  I have completely and utterly abandoned it.  And I'm gutted that I have.  I read over some of my ridiculous posts and feel sad that my girls are growing up and no longer resemble the descriptions in my posts.  I feel like I have mellowed somewhat and perhaps don't have that much to say.  Though i loved having an outlet for all my inane chat.

I don't want to make a promise to myself that I will carry on writing posts, because I can't even keep promises that I make to myself.  But... we shall see.

Meanwhile, here's a recent picture of my beautiful girls, just to show that they are growing up!

Wednesday, 25 January 2012


It's a sure sign that my blog has been well forgotten, when I couldn't even remember my blog's sign in password... hehe..

I wish i could tell you all the fantastic things that have been going on over the past.... months.  But, there's nuffin' much to report.  Though, I did shave my armpits last night - even though I wasn't going swimming.  Hannah had the spelling word 'pit' last night and she had asked me what it was.  I told her it was like a hole in the ground, or like your arm pit.  I knew that I had given a satisfactory answer, when she consolidated her understanding by saying, "so i have two armpits and you have two hairy armpits?"

Wow.  How to kick you when you're.... unshaven.  In my defence, it's been a cold winter.

Tuesday, 7 June 2011


Time goes by when you're.... doing nuffin'. 3 months since I last posted?  Even I didn't know I possessed such powers of procrastination.  Maybe I can put that on my list of talents.  Along with my other talents - yawning, sleeping, eating, watching tv...

Monday, 7 March 2011

I'll be a while...

As if I didn't have enough to distract me from the washing up, the laundry, the kids, the husband, the gym, the Biggest Loser on tv, my blog....


I shall be tweeting and facebooking it up big style.  On the move.  All the freakin' time.


Friday, 18 February 2011

Biggest Loser vs Total Loser.

"Hi, my name is Claire Campbell and I like food.  I like lots of food.  Lots of crappy, fatty, wonderful food."

This would be my opening line at a FAM.  Food Addict Meeting.  And I'd decorate my name badge to look like a burger.  To be funny.  Then I'd probably get told off for not taking the meeting seriously enough.  Pfft.

I think these kind of groups need to exist.  Well.. maybe they kind of do.  In the form of Weight Watchers classes.  All we're missing is the name badges.  We all talk about food, how much we love it, how much we eat, how we shouldn't eat so much, how we try to give up the bad food, how we feel bad when we don't.

Meh.  I feel like I'm a lifelong member at Weight Watchers.  They should give me some kind of prize for being with them for so long.  Intermittently, admittedly.  I think they should give me gastric band surgery, as a token of their appreciation for me supporting them for so long. 

So, when I get my DIY gastric band in the post from Weight Watchers, perhaps I'll find it easier at the gym and get good results like the folk on the Biggest Loser.  Perhaps then, I'll be able to lose more than 1lb per week.  Perhaps I too, will find that inner voice - that I'll be able to scream like an All Black rugby player before a game.  Perhaps I'll find the inner strength to cry and harness my feelings.  Perhaps I'll be able to rise above the anger I feel towards everyone around me.  Perhaps then I'll be able to not use food as a way of stifling my feelings.

Wait.  That's not me - I just enjoy eating.  I think I've been watching one too many episodes.  (yes - watching them online and on Sky+  IS excessive.)  And I perhaps need to realised that watching an episode IS NOT the same as going to the gym myself (it's true, Jill... sadly.)

Could someone please come and help me change the channel?  I can't reach the remote for all the pies on my couch...

Wednesday, 26 January 2011

More like Kim and Rabbie, than Kim and Aggie…


Apart from being HOT and with the nicest legs I’ve seen on a boy, Robbie has some other talents.  (Yes – having nice legs is a talent.  And he shouldn’t really hide his talents under a bushel, or in this specific case, trousers.)

He’s good at knowing when songs were released, who sang them and what he was doing at the time of their release.  It’s infuriating.

He’s good at persuasion.  I try to resist his persuasive arguments on any given subject, but end up realising (being duped?) he’s right.  Most of the time.  Being female, I reserve the right to think that I’m right all the time. 

He’s very good at providing the better side of his gene pool (I say better side, cos thankfully my kids haven’t been cursed with bad eyesight or a love/obsession with football.. or any other sports for that matter).  I have cute kids which I suppose I have to give him 50% credit for.  So, well done to him for that.  I guess it must have been very tricky for him to do.

But this other talent shines above the rest right now.  I even took photographic evidence…




When Robbie cleans, he really CLEANS.  I love it! 

Look in the first photograph at the placing of the shampoo bottles.  Arranged by height and colour.  Taller ones at the back, green ones on the left..  Nice touch.

Look at the second picture.  The girls’ bubble baths and shower gels are lined up and faced up.  (A little retail term for ya there – where all the labels are facing out the way. Winking smile)

Even Makka Pakka is perched in the corner in such a way so that he can survey the whole bathroom (that Rob had cleaned from top to bottom).

All I need now is to try and convince him to clean the bathroom while wearing shorts..